#114: No perfect “there” to reach
Learn why procrastination is about emotion, not time; why growth starts with acceptance, not criticism; how avoiding feelings limits us; and why purpose isn’t found—it’s already within us.
This past weekend, I went on a ski trip to Austria with my brother and a couple of friends. On our way back, something unexpected happened in Munich.
Our original train to Berlin was scheduled to leave at 4 PM and arrive by 8 PM. We got to the station two hours early, only to find out our train was canceled—but luckily, there was a replacement leaving around the same time.
Then my brother and a friend spotted another train departing immediately at 2 PM. Excited by the chance to get home earlier, they booked it without checking the details. We rushed onboard, thinking we’d saved two hours.
A few stops in, we realized our mistake: this train was a regional one, stopping at every station between Munich and Berlin. It wouldn’t arrive until 10 PM! What was meant to be a four-hour trip had turned into eight.
I was annoyed they hadn’t checked the arrival time. We tried switching trains, but the ticket checker told us no. For a moment, we were stuck.
But at the next station, we got off and spoke to another staff member, who helped us transfer to a faster train. We made it home by 8:30 PM—only slightly behind schedule.
The irony is, I’m usually the one obsessed with optimizing time. But this experience reminded me: not everything needs to be.
Some delays don’t require fixing. Not every minute needs squeezing. Trusting the natural pace of life—rather than micromanaging every second—can lead to better outcomes and a lot less stress.
Sometimes, waiting isn’t a waste. It’s just part of getting where you’re going.
This week at a glance:
😩 The root cause of procrastination
🌊 No perfect “there” to reach
😖 What are you unwilling to feel?
🔍 Purpose isn’t found, it’s remembered
😩 The root cause of procrastination
We sometimes engage in this irrational cycle of chronic procrastination because of an inability to manage negative moods around a task. Procrastination isn’t a unique character flaw or a mysterious curse on our ability to manage time, but a way of coping with challenging emotions and negative moods induced by certain tasks — boredom, anxiety, insecurity, frustration, resentment, and self-doubt.
Procrastination is an emotion regulation problem, not a time management problem. Procrastination is about being more focused on “the immediate urgency of managing negative moods” than getting on with the task.
When faced with a task that makes us feel anxious or insecure, the amygdala — the “threat detector” part of the brain — perceives that task as a genuine threat, in this case to our self-esteem or well-being. Even if we intellectually recognize that putting off the task will create more stress for ourselves in the future, our brains are still wired to be more concerned with removing the threat in the present. Researchers call this “amygdala hijack.”
✨ From Why You Procrastinate (It Has Nothing to Do With Self-Control)
Next time you catch yourself procrastinating on something important, pause. Instead of pushing it aside, ask: what emotion am I avoiding?
Often, the barrier isn’t the task—it’s the discomfort we refuse to feel.
The real obstacle to doing great work is our unwillingness to sit with that discomfort long enough to move through it.
🌊 No perfect “there” to reach
Many approach spirituality as just another self-improvement project—a way to fix what feels broken.
But like an oak tree at every stage of growth, we’re already whole in our current form.
The problem isn’t that we need to improve. It’s believing we’re flawed to begin with.
Growth is natural. Shame only gets in the way.
That voice in your head saying you're not good enough? It rarely belongs to you. Most of the time, it's inherited—from parents, teachers, early influences. And most of what it says isn’t even true.
If someone followed you around criticizing you every two minutes, you’d get nothing done. So why do we tolerate it from ourselves?
The goal isn’t to silence that voice—it’s to hear it differently. See it not as an enemy, but as a misguided friend. It’s trying to protect you—it’s just terrible at the job.
Growth doesn’t come from self-criticism. It comes from presence, from engaging with life as it is. As one meditation teacher put it: sit here and be—and becoming will take care of itself.
There is no perfect "there" to reach. Just this.
✨ From How Embracing Emotions Will Accelerate Your Career | Joe Hudson
😖 What are you unwilling to feel?
How do you feel when you wake up and when you get into bed at night, and how easily do you fall asleep?” The time in bed in the morning and at night tells you all you need to know. It’s not purely intellectual reasoning. It’s not a pro-and-con list. It’s not a spreadsheet. It’s not a Venn diagram. How do you feel? Are you even aware of how you’re feeling? How much energy have you spent blocking out certain feelings because you don’t want to feel certain things? There was a wise old sage who said, “There’s really only one question worth considering, and that is: What are you unwilling to feel?’” Do you wake up with a sense of foreboding and anxiety and a desire to stay in bed? When you go to bed, are you full of anxiety and worries and preoccupation about what happened, or what could happen the next day?
✨ From 5-Bullet Friday | Tim Ferriss
🔍 Purpose isn’t found, it’s remembered
Purpose isn’t something you stumble upon. It’s something you already carry.
It’s not tied to a job title or a grand mission—it’s woven into how you move through the world. What excites you, what you’re drawn to, what energizes your conversations—these are not accidents. They’re clues.
Fulfillment doesn’t come from chasing the perfect role. It comes from the intention you bring to what you already do.
Stop searching like something’s missing. Start noticing what’s already here, quietly expressing itself through your daily choices.
Your purpose isn’t hiding. It’s waiting to be seen.
✨ From Success Beyond Money — Joe Hudson
🎵 Music I’m listening to
You’ll find mostly Ethnotronica, Organic House, World, Disco, and Organic Electronic here:
🎧 If you appreciate the music I carefully select and haven't followed my Spotify playlists yet, now is the perfect time to hit that follow button and join me on this musical journey! 🎶
🌒 Pano: Danceable and electronic obscure songs
🌓 Sisy: Ethnotronica and organic house
🌑 Berghain: Dark, minimal techno and tech house
🌕 Heide: Groovy soul and disco house
🌞 Sonntag: Afterhours shit
🦥 Slow rave: Sleepy techno for tired danced
🌎 World: From Latin jazz to Turkish psych
🌚 Super Slow: For your intimate moments
Previously on Pursuit:
